You're Not The Boss Of Me

It's been a very long time since I've posted here, but I just had to write about a comment that was left on this blog by someone who wishes to remain anonymous. This person has a problem with bloggers and other writers because we are self absorbed in get in their way. I find this funny since this person went out of their way to visit my blog, read a post and then leave a comment that was negative. If anyone in this scenario is an attention whore, it would be anonymous for sure. Most bloggers and writers I have met have more important things to do with their lives and make a difference in other peoples' lives by writing and blogging. I've enjoyed blogging even though I don't have much time to invest in it much anymore, but it is a great, creative outlet for me and helps me develop other creative outlets by blogging about them. If that's self absorbed, then that's what I am and I'm proud of it.

On friday, I thought I was headed for a rather uneventful weekend. That was until the mail came. My mail always comes a bit later in the afternoon and friday was no exception. There were the usual junk mail envelopes and pleas to apply for yet another credit card, and then there was a letter from my gynocologist telling me that my pap smear came back abnormal and that I would have to have a test called a colposcopy. The letter then further explained the procedure with a reassurance that there was no evidence of cancer. However, I did not feel very reassured at all. Of course, by the time I got the letter, the doctor's office was just about closing and my doctor was off that day any way. Thankfully, I have good friends. I reached out to them and those who have gone through the same thing reached out to me and reassured me that it was no worse than the usual exam except that the doctor would be looking more closely through a special microscope. I'm still not happy, but I'm much calmer now and, if you believe in signs, I got a very appropriate message in my fortune cookie yesterday that said "don't allow unexpected situations throw you". That one was a keeper!

I recently began a job with Zip Realty. This is an internet based real estate company that gets all their leads directly from their website and then farms the leads out to various real estate agents. Agents are not independent contractors, as with traditional real estate companies. Rather, they are actual employees of the company. They are expected to undergo rigorous training, attend all meetings, conferences (both by telephone and internet) as well as mandatory "warm calling" sessions (which to me seem more like detention for real estate agents than anything else). I worked for this company for exactly two weeks. I found their over-bearing need to micro-manage agents at every level completely contrary to why I got into real estate in the first place. I wanted a career where I could control my own destiny and not have it controlled by others, as with traditional jobs. This company boasts that you work from home, but what they don't tell you is how many times you are expected to clock in during office hours (traditional 9-5 even for "warm calling" sessions) and then meet all the expectations for your clients (approximately sixty leads per month, more or less). Yes, they reimburse expenses (at least in my area), but their commission pay out for agents is far lower than traditional real estate agents. If the average income for one of their agents is $2,200 per month, that might actually break down to just about minimum wage given all the hours an agent is expected to put in during office hours, after hours and weekends. The worst part for me though was that I felt as if I had traveled back in time to high school. I hadn't felt this belittled in years. How can anyone actually thrive in an atmosphere where agents were black-listed for not meeting all their clients' expectations? How could we when we were expected to attend to so much coporate bullshit (pardon my language) and still meet the needs of the clients based on the company's expectations. I actually registered as a client with Zip on two separate occasions and both times neither agent contacted me within the required twelve hour period. This is seen as being too lax by company standards, but what I learned as an agent is that most of these leads (more than ninety percent) won't ever lead to a sale for Zip any way so maybe savvy agents have learned to weed out those leads and concentrate on ones that will actually make them some money. All in all, this might be a great experience for newly licensed agents, but seasoned agents would do much better in a traditional agency or, better still, go for a broker's license and open up your own. My final word on Zip is that they better watch the competition very carefully. Both Prudential and Remax are heavily investing in marketing their own websites right now to attract internet buyers and sellers.

Are you looking for new ways to connect to people? Start thinking outside the box and go directly to Facebook. Here you will not find the usual mix of high schoolers looking to hook up, but rather an eclectic group of college students, alumni, authors, artists and anyone who is passionate about reaching out to the rest of the world. If you really want to make the internet work for you, this is a great way and best of all it's free. Want to know what else is free? Check out Book Movement. This is a great place for people who are passionate about reading, but, if you are in a book club then it's a great place to get suggestions for books for your group. You can even enter to win a new selection for your book club to read and review.

Last night The New York Giants won the Superbowl (as if you didn't already know this). They were not the favorite to win. In fact many sports enthusiasts had named the Patriots to be the winners with Tom Brady ending a perfect season. The Giants were obviously fueled by these predictions and came out fighting all through the game. Even in the last ten minutes it seemed like they wouldn't win, but they pulled through with flying colors thanks to their team leader, Eli Manning. The moral of this story is never to give up your dreams and believe that you can win.

Originally when I began this blog, I wanted to add some parenting tips and experiences. I haven't done so much of that, but now is as good a time as any to talk about the many milestones parents have to muddle through with their children as they pass from one stage of life to another. When my kids were little, a knee scrape required nothing more than a hug, a spray of Bactine and a band-aid. Now that my children are approaching adulthood, problems are far more complicated and require far more strategy. My college freshman son just found out that he is on academic probation. This is not at all uncommon for new college students who are learning to balance school with a social life and laundry. I only wish there were some easy answers as to how to guide him through this difficult time, but really this is where I need to step back and let him manage his own life. He may not succeed. Maybe this college isn't the right one for him, but he has to determine that for himself. As a mom, I've had to force myself to step out of my micro-managing role and allow him to experience the pain of falling down and having to pick himself up. Of course, we (his father and I) will always support him as long as he does his level best to achieve his goals, but we've learned the hard way too and now, so must he.

I have little time to read, but recently picked up a copy of Eat, Pray, Love. I was slightly intrigued by the author's first visit to Oprah, but my interest was completely peaked when she was asked to make another appearance about a month later to address some of the mail the show had received about her first appearance. While out doing some holiday shopping, I noticed the book being predominantly displayed and took that as a sign that it was time to buy it. I've been consuming it little by little every day. I have to admit I am truly spellbound by this woman's journey and have made some little self discoveries as well. For instance, I notice that a lot of time, the voices in my head are not my own. Before you think that I'm crazy, let me explain that I often times hear my mother's voice or my boss, or my husband or even my own kids. I've ceased to listen to my own voice because I am more interested in pleasing others than myself. I now know that I need to stop doing that and listen more carefully to my own voice. If you happen to pass a bookstore in the near future, please give this book a try. There's really something for everyone in this book, but if you are a woman, you will especially see yourself somewhere in the pages of this book.